"What's up?" He said with his arms reached out. Nicki slowly leaned in and gave a small smile. He hugged her tight which caused her to tighten her arms around him. He dipped her back and let out a deep sigh.
"It's been 2 and a half years." Nicki said as he stood her up making sure she caught her balance. Once she got it her hands moved from around his waist to his wrists.
"I know." He said before licking his lips out of habit. "This feels weird." They released each other and Nicki sat down on Safaree's couch. Safaree walked over to the fridge and grabbed two water bottles. He closed the door and walked over to Nicki. She grabbed the water bottle from him and opened it taking a sip. He sat down next to her and dropped the water bottle beside him while positioning himself to look at her. "You look the same."
Nicki laughed. "Well I didn't change anything, Safaree. You got your teeth done?" Nicki reached out to touch the side of his face and her thumb gently moved his bottom lip. "They look nice. You look nice." She moved her hand from his mouth to the back of his neck. "I haven't touched you in so long. I missed it."
"Me too." He said before licking his lips. "Your random touching. I'm not gonna lie I kind of missed it."
"Kind of?" Nicki raised an eyebrow and rolled her eyes playfully. She took her hand off his neck and leaned back on the couch getting comfortable. "Your place is nice." Nicki said as she looked around. She stretched her legs out on Safaree indicating that he should sit back. He sat back and pulled at her legs gently pulling her body as close to him as possible. She leaned her head back and folded her hands across her stomach. "It's really nice. Who decorated in here? It's not your usual red bachelor pad shit but it doesn't look feminine either."
"Thanks. I know it's nothing like yours. You even comfortable here?" He joked in reference to his place being noticeably smaller than the houses he lived in when they were together. She gave a small laugh. "I got female friends." He said in reference to her last comment. She cut her eyes at him and twitched her lip. He laughed. "I said friends. That's it." He ran his hand up to her thigh and gripped it tightly. "Yo. I've just missed being around you." He looked over at her wide smile. "We don't even have to talk for the rest of the day. I could just look at you."
"You wanna know what's so crazy? I've imagined this moment in my head so many times, Safaree." she said with her voice trailing off. She licked her lips and looked over at the tv not really paying attention to it, but setting her eyes on something else. "And I've had in my head everything I wanted to say to you. It was really perfect in my head. I thought I would be crying my eyes out." She looked back at over his serious face. "But all I can think about now is how I've missed your face." She laughed. "Your goofy ass obnoxious laugh." She rested her head on his shoulder and trailed her hands down his arm before resting one hand on top of his as the other locked fingers with his.
"I don't want to talk about the past. These last couple years of my life..." She sighed. "Every bad thing that went wrong... I just wanted to talk to you. My brother. The show being canceled. Losing 2 of my best friends. The argument with my mom. Everything." She took a moment to reflect. "I know I moved on. I was getting really good at thinking you never wanted to see me again and accepting it. But then something bad would happen and I would just want to hear you tell me how it's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay. You give me some life long speech that has nothing to do with what I'm sad about, tell me a joke to make me smile and then feed me." They shared a laugh. "The first year was okay but this last year... I was falling apart."
"You kept it together."
"You think?"
"I thought our situation was permanent. I know you. I knew you. But during the time, man. I felt like I didn't. I thought you were happy. You were good. You didn't need me."
"You knew something. You reached out." She lifted her head up and rested her chin on his shoulder.
"Can I be honest?"
"We're starting over right?" She laughed a little.
"Your mom reached out."
"Ugh." Nicki said before leaning off his shoulder and leaning back on the couch. She pulled his hand that was still locked and covered with her hands into her lap. She stared at their hands, turning them around and looking at them.
"You know me, Safaree." She looked over at him. "I love my mother with all my heart. But I cannot sit there with them and act like that's okay!" She said just a tad bit louder the longer she went on. "You know what he did to me. You know our family secrets." She rested her head back again and looked over at him looking down. "I can't believe after all these years nothing has changed."
"You can't be mad at your mom though." He looked back at her and they held eye contact. "She's just tryna help him out. Would you do the same for your son?"
"No Safaree! It's fucking wrong. I don't want him around my nieces like that. I don't want him around Micaiah like that. We've hid our family secrets for long enough but once you do this to someone else's child you need to pay." She let go of his hand and grabbed at the pillow beside her. She aggressively fluffed it up before sitting it in her lap with her arms over. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. No one sees my side." She ran her nail over the trace of the design on the pillow with her lips poured.
"Nicki. I get it. I know you. I know your mom. What he did was fucked up. The first time and every time. You can't put it all on your mom. She don't want to lose a son." He raised his arm behind her head and laid it on top of the couch. He licked his lips and looked down at her. They shared a comfortable stare before she rolled her eyes. "And for real, if she wasn't gonna take his side then he would've went away when he did what he did to you."
"It's just hurtful. It's always put a strain on our relationship." she shook her head. "Let's talk about something else." She looked over at him and pointed a finger in his face. "You. Don't ever do reality tv again." She shook her head at the fact that Safaree's loud laugh roared out before she could even finish the last two words of that sentence. She shook her head laughing and put her finger down.
"You wasn't feeling it?"
"No, Safaree. And you knew I wouldn't like it, and that's why you did it."
"Hey, I was single. Enjoying life. Coconut oil. The beach. The women."
"Stop." Nicki held up her hand. "You know better. And I didn't like any of them."
"Hey I didn't like yours either." He shrugged.
"No, Safaree. K. Michelle?" They laughed. "You talked about her when we would watch Love & Hip Hop saying little sexual comments about her to piss me off. But you really dated her! I couldn't believe it. When Candice sent me pictures of the two of you I hated it. I hated seeing you with her on TV. Going on your stupid little dates."
"We were never together." He laughed when Nicki's head snapped up at him and looked him directly in the eyes. "We were just friends. A lot of them girls you seen me with... we was just friends."
"You're lying."
"I swear." He raised his hands up as if he was surrendering. "I had two girlfriends the whole time. I hung with a lot of them. I went out with them. We would go to dinner. But it was never a girlfriend. You just assumed." He shrugged again before dropping his hands on her legs. "TV was fun for me. I got to show people who I am. I got to meet new people. Have new experiences. I went to a couple weddings. I loved it. I don't regret a thing. Kind of wish I would've went through with the dating show." he laughed at Nicki making an annoyed noise at his last statement. "Nah but. Something else almost happened."
"Hm?"
"I almost got married." He said in a serious tone and looked over at her. They stared at each other without saying anything. "For real."
"What stopped you?"
"It wasn't you."
Nicki's arm reached out, back handing him on the shoulder.
"Ah!" Safaree reached up and grabbed at his shoulder where Nicki had just hit him. "That actually hurt. Your nail got me." He rubbed the spot and Nicki laughed.
"Move your hand, let me see." She moved his hand out the way and hit his shoulder again. "You're fine."
"See. I don't miss the abuse."
"Shut up. I don't abuse you." she leaned back on the couch and stared at him. "No, really. Tell me. Why not?"
"It just didn't feel right. I don't know." he shrugged. "I proposed. She said yeah. Right away. She didn't hesitate like when I asked you." he said before chuckling. "But that's not really what I wanted. Who I wanted it to be with. About a month before the wedding I just called it off. I couldn't do it." he shook his head. "I couldn't."
"You were waiting for me?" She asked quietly while looking down at her nails.
"I always will. But even now I'm not ready [for marriage]." he paused. "I still gotta get my mind right. I did a lot of thinking when you were gone."
"Yeah? About what?"
"Just everything. How it all went down. How it all started. The breakup. All of it. There's some things I would change and some things I wouldn't." He paused. "Maybe this all had to happen. I changed a lot. I'm willing to talk things out. You know I'm infamous for disappearing."
"How could I forget?!" Nicki said making a joke out of the sore situation.
"Yeah. Well." he licked his lips again out of habit. "I'm willing to talk it out. I'll answer you. Any questions. I'll answer. Any time you speak, I'll listen."
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"Being consistent." she laughed. "I would've stayed in that situation no matter how many doubts I had. I had said some really hurtful things about you. But you proved me right. You're a way more forgiving person than I am. And for that I'm sorry. About all of it."
"I know how you are. You say some fucked up things when you're mad but you never mean them. Doesn't take away that it's fucked up." He lifted an arm and wrapped it around her neck gently pulling her closer to him. He kissed her on the forehead and Nicki took a hand, grabbing his, and locking their fingers again.
"So what's next for us, Fonty?"
He smiled at her mentioning a nickname she had given him many years ago when they were in Japan.
"Whatever you want next, Lee." she smiled back. "But I think we should just do us. The whole public thing wouldn't be good for you right now. Let everything die down with your family. People are gonna have something to say. Our mind has to be right going into this again. I'm not stepping out. I'm not lying. I'm 100% focused on us. What about you?"
"I'll do anything not to lose you again, Faree. You don't understand how hard it was for me when you first left. I cried everyday for those 4 months I was alone." she held his hand tighter. "I messed up too and I made it about you. I'm sorry."
"I've forgiven you for it all. Do you forgive me?"
"I forgave you when you called." she gave a small laugh. "I was so nervous to answer the phone, Safaree. Mommy had given me your new number just in case I ever got the balls to call you again. When your name was on the screen I froze."
"I have that effect on women."
"Be quiet." she said playfully. "I never stopped thinking about you." she admitted. "I kept having dreams and I would wake up feeling so stupid. I agree with you. We should do everything how we want this time. And when you're ready for me to show you off to the world I won't think twice." She looked up at him nodding his head. She stared at his lips and sat there for a moment. He felt her eyes planted on him and looked down at her.
"I'm cute to you?"
"You look better than I remember."
"So do you. Put on a little weight."
"Oh my gosh!" she looked down at their hands in her lap. "Why would you say that, Safaree? I'm getting fat."
"I like it." she leaned down and kissed her on the nose. "I love when your face is round." She laughed and reached up holding his face with her free hand.
"Can I have a real kiss?"
"I've been waiting on that." he said as he leaned down and kissed her on the lips. They held it for a while before Nicki pulled away before looking at his face and giving him another quick peck.
"I really, really, missed you." she said before laughing. She let go of his hand and moved her legs off of his body. She stood up pulling down her shirt and walking over to the kitchen.
"What are you doing?" Safaree asked confused at the interruption and movement from the moment they were having.
"I'm about to cook for you." she said as she opened his fridge looking over the food. "Who did this shopping for you, Faree? You're like a different person." she scanned the fridge looking over nothing but healthy stuff and rolled her eyes not being able to think of anything to make. He stood up from the couch and walked over into the kitchen. "I can't make anything out of lettuce and vitamin water, Safaree." she said as she stared over at him coming closer to her. She let go of the fridge doors when he stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Her smile grew as she turned around and took steps forward walking over to the cabinets.
"With the weight gain your ass got bigger." he laughed and Nicki smacked his arm. "I'm not complaining." he said before he kissed her on the neck. "I'll order something for us. Anything you want." he turned her body around and grabbed her waist sitting her on the counter. "Talk to me."
"I just want to eat and lay with you for the rest of the night." she stared at him. "I could go for some chicken."
"You could always go for some chicken." He said as he looked around for his phone.
"You're falling back into your old ways, Faree. I don't like this teasing." she placed her hands on the ends of the counter and leaned forward.
"I love you." he said before he picked up his phone while scrolling through to find the number of their favorite place that served Nicki's favorite chicken. She smiled and hopped off of the counter. She walked over to him while staring at him putting the phone to his ear. She wrapped her arms around his back and hugged him tight.
"Love you more."
"It's been 2 and a half years." Nicki said as he stood her up making sure she caught her balance. Once she got it her hands moved from around his waist to his wrists.
"I know." He said before licking his lips out of habit. "This feels weird." They released each other and Nicki sat down on Safaree's couch. Safaree walked over to the fridge and grabbed two water bottles. He closed the door and walked over to Nicki. She grabbed the water bottle from him and opened it taking a sip. He sat down next to her and dropped the water bottle beside him while positioning himself to look at her. "You look the same."
Nicki laughed. "Well I didn't change anything, Safaree. You got your teeth done?" Nicki reached out to touch the side of his face and her thumb gently moved his bottom lip. "They look nice. You look nice." She moved her hand from his mouth to the back of his neck. "I haven't touched you in so long. I missed it."
"Me too." He said before licking his lips. "Your random touching. I'm not gonna lie I kind of missed it."
"Kind of?" Nicki raised an eyebrow and rolled her eyes playfully. She took her hand off his neck and leaned back on the couch getting comfortable. "Your place is nice." Nicki said as she looked around. She stretched her legs out on Safaree indicating that he should sit back. He sat back and pulled at her legs gently pulling her body as close to him as possible. She leaned her head back and folded her hands across her stomach. "It's really nice. Who decorated in here? It's not your usual red bachelor pad shit but it doesn't look feminine either."
"Thanks. I know it's nothing like yours. You even comfortable here?" He joked in reference to his place being noticeably smaller than the houses he lived in when they were together. She gave a small laugh. "I got female friends." He said in reference to her last comment. She cut her eyes at him and twitched her lip. He laughed. "I said friends. That's it." He ran his hand up to her thigh and gripped it tightly. "Yo. I've just missed being around you." He looked over at her wide smile. "We don't even have to talk for the rest of the day. I could just look at you."
"You wanna know what's so crazy? I've imagined this moment in my head so many times, Safaree." she said with her voice trailing off. She licked her lips and looked over at the tv not really paying attention to it, but setting her eyes on something else. "And I've had in my head everything I wanted to say to you. It was really perfect in my head. I thought I would be crying my eyes out." She looked back at over his serious face. "But all I can think about now is how I've missed your face." She laughed. "Your goofy ass obnoxious laugh." She rested her head on his shoulder and trailed her hands down his arm before resting one hand on top of his as the other locked fingers with his.
"I don't want to talk about the past. These last couple years of my life..." She sighed. "Every bad thing that went wrong... I just wanted to talk to you. My brother. The show being canceled. Losing 2 of my best friends. The argument with my mom. Everything." She took a moment to reflect. "I know I moved on. I was getting really good at thinking you never wanted to see me again and accepting it. But then something bad would happen and I would just want to hear you tell me how it's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay. You give me some life long speech that has nothing to do with what I'm sad about, tell me a joke to make me smile and then feed me." They shared a laugh. "The first year was okay but this last year... I was falling apart."
"You kept it together."
"You think?"
"I thought our situation was permanent. I know you. I knew you. But during the time, man. I felt like I didn't. I thought you were happy. You were good. You didn't need me."
"You knew something. You reached out." She lifted her head up and rested her chin on his shoulder.
"Can I be honest?"
"We're starting over right?" She laughed a little.
"Your mom reached out."
"Ugh." Nicki said before leaning off his shoulder and leaning back on the couch. She pulled his hand that was still locked and covered with her hands into her lap. She stared at their hands, turning them around and looking at them.
"You know me, Safaree." She looked over at him. "I love my mother with all my heart. But I cannot sit there with them and act like that's okay!" She said just a tad bit louder the longer she went on. "You know what he did to me. You know our family secrets." She rested her head back again and looked over at him looking down. "I can't believe after all these years nothing has changed."
"You can't be mad at your mom though." He looked back at her and they held eye contact. "She's just tryna help him out. Would you do the same for your son?"
"No Safaree! It's fucking wrong. I don't want him around my nieces like that. I don't want him around Micaiah like that. We've hid our family secrets for long enough but once you do this to someone else's child you need to pay." She let go of his hand and grabbed at the pillow beside her. She aggressively fluffed it up before sitting it in her lap with her arms over. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. No one sees my side." She ran her nail over the trace of the design on the pillow with her lips poured.
"Nicki. I get it. I know you. I know your mom. What he did was fucked up. The first time and every time. You can't put it all on your mom. She don't want to lose a son." He raised his arm behind her head and laid it on top of the couch. He licked his lips and looked down at her. They shared a comfortable stare before she rolled her eyes. "And for real, if she wasn't gonna take his side then he would've went away when he did what he did to you."
"It's just hurtful. It's always put a strain on our relationship." she shook her head. "Let's talk about something else." She looked over at him and pointed a finger in his face. "You. Don't ever do reality tv again." She shook her head at the fact that Safaree's loud laugh roared out before she could even finish the last two words of that sentence. She shook her head laughing and put her finger down.
"You wasn't feeling it?"
"No, Safaree. And you knew I wouldn't like it, and that's why you did it."
"Hey, I was single. Enjoying life. Coconut oil. The beach. The women."
"Stop." Nicki held up her hand. "You know better. And I didn't like any of them."
"Hey I didn't like yours either." He shrugged.
"No, Safaree. K. Michelle?" They laughed. "You talked about her when we would watch Love & Hip Hop saying little sexual comments about her to piss me off. But you really dated her! I couldn't believe it. When Candice sent me pictures of the two of you I hated it. I hated seeing you with her on TV. Going on your stupid little dates."
"We were never together." He laughed when Nicki's head snapped up at him and looked him directly in the eyes. "We were just friends. A lot of them girls you seen me with... we was just friends."
"You're lying."
"I swear." He raised his hands up as if he was surrendering. "I had two girlfriends the whole time. I hung with a lot of them. I went out with them. We would go to dinner. But it was never a girlfriend. You just assumed." He shrugged again before dropping his hands on her legs. "TV was fun for me. I got to show people who I am. I got to meet new people. Have new experiences. I went to a couple weddings. I loved it. I don't regret a thing. Kind of wish I would've went through with the dating show." he laughed at Nicki making an annoyed noise at his last statement. "Nah but. Something else almost happened."
"Hm?"
"I almost got married." He said in a serious tone and looked over at her. They stared at each other without saying anything. "For real."
"What stopped you?"
"It wasn't you."
Nicki's arm reached out, back handing him on the shoulder.
"Ah!" Safaree reached up and grabbed at his shoulder where Nicki had just hit him. "That actually hurt. Your nail got me." He rubbed the spot and Nicki laughed.
"Move your hand, let me see." She moved his hand out the way and hit his shoulder again. "You're fine."
"See. I don't miss the abuse."
"Shut up. I don't abuse you." she leaned back on the couch and stared at him. "No, really. Tell me. Why not?"
"It just didn't feel right. I don't know." he shrugged. "I proposed. She said yeah. Right away. She didn't hesitate like when I asked you." he said before chuckling. "But that's not really what I wanted. Who I wanted it to be with. About a month before the wedding I just called it off. I couldn't do it." he shook his head. "I couldn't."
"You were waiting for me?" She asked quietly while looking down at her nails.
"I always will. But even now I'm not ready [for marriage]." he paused. "I still gotta get my mind right. I did a lot of thinking when you were gone."
"Yeah? About what?"
"Just everything. How it all went down. How it all started. The breakup. All of it. There's some things I would change and some things I wouldn't." He paused. "Maybe this all had to happen. I changed a lot. I'm willing to talk things out. You know I'm infamous for disappearing."
"How could I forget?!" Nicki said making a joke out of the sore situation.
"Yeah. Well." he licked his lips again out of habit. "I'm willing to talk it out. I'll answer you. Any questions. I'll answer. Any time you speak, I'll listen."
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"Being consistent." she laughed. "I would've stayed in that situation no matter how many doubts I had. I had said some really hurtful things about you. But you proved me right. You're a way more forgiving person than I am. And for that I'm sorry. About all of it."
"I know how you are. You say some fucked up things when you're mad but you never mean them. Doesn't take away that it's fucked up." He lifted an arm and wrapped it around her neck gently pulling her closer to him. He kissed her on the forehead and Nicki took a hand, grabbing his, and locking their fingers again.
"So what's next for us, Fonty?"
He smiled at her mentioning a nickname she had given him many years ago when they were in Japan.
"Whatever you want next, Lee." she smiled back. "But I think we should just do us. The whole public thing wouldn't be good for you right now. Let everything die down with your family. People are gonna have something to say. Our mind has to be right going into this again. I'm not stepping out. I'm not lying. I'm 100% focused on us. What about you?"
"I'll do anything not to lose you again, Faree. You don't understand how hard it was for me when you first left. I cried everyday for those 4 months I was alone." she held his hand tighter. "I messed up too and I made it about you. I'm sorry."
"I've forgiven you for it all. Do you forgive me?"
"I forgave you when you called." she gave a small laugh. "I was so nervous to answer the phone, Safaree. Mommy had given me your new number just in case I ever got the balls to call you again. When your name was on the screen I froze."
"I have that effect on women."
"Be quiet." she said playfully. "I never stopped thinking about you." she admitted. "I kept having dreams and I would wake up feeling so stupid. I agree with you. We should do everything how we want this time. And when you're ready for me to show you off to the world I won't think twice." She looked up at him nodding his head. She stared at his lips and sat there for a moment. He felt her eyes planted on him and looked down at her.
"I'm cute to you?"
"You look better than I remember."
"So do you. Put on a little weight."
"Oh my gosh!" she looked down at their hands in her lap. "Why would you say that, Safaree? I'm getting fat."
"I like it." she leaned down and kissed her on the nose. "I love when your face is round." She laughed and reached up holding his face with her free hand.
"Can I have a real kiss?"
"I've been waiting on that." he said as he leaned down and kissed her on the lips. They held it for a while before Nicki pulled away before looking at his face and giving him another quick peck.
"I really, really, missed you." she said before laughing. She let go of his hand and moved her legs off of his body. She stood up pulling down her shirt and walking over to the kitchen.
"What are you doing?" Safaree asked confused at the interruption and movement from the moment they were having.
"I'm about to cook for you." she said as she opened his fridge looking over the food. "Who did this shopping for you, Faree? You're like a different person." she scanned the fridge looking over nothing but healthy stuff and rolled her eyes not being able to think of anything to make. He stood up from the couch and walked over into the kitchen. "I can't make anything out of lettuce and vitamin water, Safaree." she said as she stared over at him coming closer to her. She let go of the fridge doors when he stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Her smile grew as she turned around and took steps forward walking over to the cabinets.
"With the weight gain your ass got bigger." he laughed and Nicki smacked his arm. "I'm not complaining." he said before he kissed her on the neck. "I'll order something for us. Anything you want." he turned her body around and grabbed her waist sitting her on the counter. "Talk to me."
"I just want to eat and lay with you for the rest of the night." she stared at him. "I could go for some chicken."
"You could always go for some chicken." He said as he looked around for his phone.
"You're falling back into your old ways, Faree. I don't like this teasing." she placed her hands on the ends of the counter and leaned forward.
"I love you." he said before he picked up his phone while scrolling through to find the number of their favorite place that served Nicki's favorite chicken. She smiled and hopped off of the counter. She walked over to him while staring at him putting the phone to his ear. She wrapped her arms around his back and hugged him tight.
"Love you more."
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